#1 It's fun to dance around your questions.
Secondly, you lay out hypotheticals that never took place. Death is a raw reality, not coulda shoulda woulda. Let's deal with what happened. As far as I'm concerned had another person been killed, regardless of age, it would have compounded the tragedy, not made it less significant.
That's your prerogative that you don't feel bad for him. I don't think it makes you some tough insensitive guy that has a stick up his ass. Although sometimes I do think that about you