Quote:
Originally Posted by redsk1
If you wait til everything is perfect you'll be waiting the rest of your life. It'll never be. So, the answer is, you never know, you've just got to go for it. You'll be ready, you'll have to be ready.
BTW...expecting our 3rd now.
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Exactly.
(son is going to be 3 in November)
You can never be 100% ready in every way. You can plan financially...get debt paid down and money saved up...but the truth is, babies are very expensive. You just have to put your finances in line the best you can and wait until you're EMOTIONALLY ready to take on the responsibility. My wife and I waited until she was 28 and I was 27, after we had the house for about 5 years and both agreed we were ready. She was "ready" a couple of years before me. I, being an accountant, was focused on things like finances and insurance, and debt elimination. We reached a point where I was comfortable financially and prepared mentally to do it.
Looking back, she admits we waited until the perfect time.
One thing you need to decide before-hand...will be whether she goes back to work or is a stay-at-home mother, which is far better for the child's development and as far as instilling YOUR morals in the kid, instead of the babysitter's. Young kids take in a LOT in those first few year and are very easy influenced in things that can stick around for a lifetime. You want the best possible environment at that young age, or later on, it would be a nightmare trying to adjust or re-instill the values and behaviors you wanted, but couldn't because someone else was caring for them.
My wife was able to do some work remotely from home for a couple of years, but her hours were about 1/3 of a full-time job. I had to pick up the slack with a second job to replace her lost income...BUT, it's worth it. Our son is very well-behaved and intelligent and he gets the parent time he needs, even though it's mostly mommy Monday-Friday.
Some say you can never afford a child. I wouldn't say that, but it may take sacrifices and adjustments to do so. However, the #1 thing to do to get prepared is to make sure you're ready for the commitment mentally...and your wife and you need to discuss and agree upon the childcare/daycare situation ahead of time if you have not already.
Good luck and congrats on moving on to the next adventurous stage of your life. It won't always be easy, but there's nothing better and more fulfilling than being a dad.