[Lotus]

Jason La Canflorio
The Washington Post
April 17, 2009

Snyder Traded to Bengals

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Today the Washington Redskins traded owner Dan Snyder to the Cincinnati Bengals for a late-round 2010 pick and a pack of Ryder tarot cards.

Snyder is expected to start at owner in Cincinnati. The Bengals have long sought an owner to replace Mike Brown, whom they consider to be undersized and lacking in the explosiveness which NFL teams desire. Brown is now expected to back up Snyder.

Redskins coach Jim Zorn said, “This leaves an obvious hole in our roster but we felt that we had to pull the trigger on the deal. With the tarot cards, our organizational decision-making should be better than it has been since 1999.”

It remains unclear who now will fill the position of owner on the Redskins. Early speculation has centered around in-house candidate Clinton Portis, although the Redskins may choose to pick up Matthew McConaughey, who is currently a free agent. The Redskins may also choose to fill the position with the 13th pick in the upcoming NFL draft.