RIP Mitch Hedberg

[NY_Skinsfan]

A great comedian............

[Bozzy]

I was going to see him live in baltimore this weekend....I was so psyched for it too.

[Cush]

"When you go a resturant on the weekends and it's busy so they start a waiting list. They say Dufrane, party of two, table ready for Dufrane, party of two , and if no one answers they'll say the name again, Dufrane, party of two. Bu then if no one answers, they'll move on to the next name. Bush party of three. Yeah, but what happened to the Dufranes, No one seems to care, who can eat at a time like this? People are missing. You people are selfish. The Dufranes are in someone's trunk right now ,with duct tape over their mouths and they're hungry.That's a double whammy! We need help! Bush search party of three. You can eat once you find the Dufranes."

[Daseal]

Im horrible with names, but was this the guy who used to stare at the ground while doing his act?

[NY_Skinsfan]

Originally Posted by Daseal

Im horrible with names, but was this the guy who used to stare at the ground while doing his act?

yeah, he has the long hair that covered most of his face and he stared at the ground all the time.

Here's his site.

[BrudLee]

Originally Posted by Daseal

Im horrible with names, but was this the guy who used to stare at the ground while doing his act?

You might also be thinking of Steven Wright.

[NY_Skinsfan]

Some of his quotes..

I want to be a race car passenger: just a guy who bugs the driver. "Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Can I put my feet out the window? Boy, you really like Tide."

My lucky number is four billion. That doesn't come in real handy when you're gambling. "Come on, four billion! Fuck. Seven. I need more dice."

Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right.

The thing about tennis is: no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're fucking relentless.

I find a duck's opinion of me depends heavily on whether or not I have bread.

[BrudLee]

Still more:

I got an ant farm. Them fellas didn't grow shit.

I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load shit into a truck.

I got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important than others.

I had a stick of Carefree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.

I got in an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because I tried to walk out, and had to slam the flap.

I type a 101 words a minute. But it's in my own language.

I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry. And that's extra scary to me, because there's a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside. Run. He's fuzzy. Get outta here.

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.

My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She made it half way. She's an actress, she just never gets called to the set.

I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.

If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be fucked up.

I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall.

Pickles are cucumbers that sold out.

I was walking down the street with my friend and he said "I hear music." As if there's any other way to take it in.

2-in-1 is a bullshit term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That's why 2 was created.

I know a lot about cars. I can look at a car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.

This shirt is dry clean only. Which means...it's dirty.

[Cush]

"When we were on acid we'd go into the woods, because when you're in the woods tripping there's less likely chance you'll run into an authority figure. But we ran into a bear, that' was even more of a buzzkill. My friend Dwayne was standing there raising his right hand, swearing to help prevent forest fires. We got away from the bear and he put his arm around my shoulder and said Mitchell, "Smokey is way more intense in person. He's an asshole."

[Bozzy]

Every McDonald’s commercial end the same way, right? McDonald’s commercials end like this “prices and participation may vary.” Now I wanna open up a McDonald’s and not participate in anything. I wanna be a stubborn McDonald’s owner. I’ll say, “Cheeseburgers? Nope… we got spaghetti… and blankets! But we’re not affiliated with that clown. He attracts too many children.

[SKINSnCANES]

this guy was hillarious. I would listen to his cd all the time iwth my friend. We quote his jokes all the time, and were doing it last night when we could out. It definitly made us both sad.

[MTK]

I just saw him tonight on Comedy Central, damn this guy was really funny, what a shame!