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10-11-2006, 11:06 AM
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#1 |
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ellicott City, MD
Age: 42
Posts: 8,029
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the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
We already have a "TJ Duckett Conspiracy" thread going, but I haven't heard any conspiracy theories yet, so I've decided to make a thread designed for just such a discussion (plus, as usual, I am bored).
Here are just a few thoughts: - Gibbs hates college football and didn't want to be bothered with looking at potential draft picks - TJ Duckett makes such good BBQ sauce that the team just needed to get him up here - Mike Sellers always wanted a twin brother, and what Mike Sellers wants Mike Sellers gets - Duckett lied and said he could kickoff - Look at this picture and tell me you wouldn't trade half your picks to get this guy on your team: http://www.nea.org/readacross/images...heatleyweb.jpg - We knew he'd be great on 3rd and 1....oh wait, forget that one These aren't my best work. Anyone else have any ideas?
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"Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man." The Dude Last edited by ArtMonkDrillz; 10-11-2006 at 11:08 AM. Reason: I titled the thread wrong |
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10-11-2006, 11:13 AM
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#2 |
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ellicott City, MD
Age: 42
Posts: 8,029
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
I just realized that I, being the complete idiot that I am, gave my theories for why the FO traded for Duckett, not why he isn't playing, as the title of the thread would suggest.
So, he's not playing because: - He says all white makes him look fat, so he refuses to dress - he's too quick with a high five and a cup of Gatorade to risk actually sending him onto the field - He's a mouth-breather, and that's really distracting in the huddle - Betts keeps winning "Rock, Paper, Scissors" - We're saving him for the late season playoff run - My friend Mike drafted him in the 8th round of our fantasy draft and we all need justification for mocking him
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"Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man." The Dude |
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10-11-2006, 11:25 AM
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#3 |
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Playmaker
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Roanoke, VA
Posts: 3,508
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
My theory on why he isn't playing is based on the all too sensitive topic of 'roids....
HEMMORRHOIDS!
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"I hope I'm getting better. I hope you haven't seen my best." - Jim Zorn |
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10-11-2006, 11:30 AM
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#4 |
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Uncle Phil
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 45,256
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
He killed Southeast Jerome
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You're So Vain...You Probably Think This Sig Is About You |
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10-11-2006, 11:32 AM
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#5 |
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ellicott City, MD
Age: 42
Posts: 8,029
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
He ate Gibbs' special sugar-free lunch
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"Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man." The Dude |
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10-11-2006, 11:41 AM
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#6 |
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Most Interesting Man in the World
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Chantilly, VA
Age: 37
Posts: 8,606
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
He really is Rick Ross(the song Everyday I'm Hustlin'), and he scares people with his beard on the sideline
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Vacancy |
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10-11-2006, 11:47 AM
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#7 |
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I like big (_|_)s.
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Charlottesville, Virginia
Age: 43
Posts: 19,254
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
Because he would not do it with a fox, he would not do it in a box, he does not like green eggs and ham, he does not like them Sam-I-Am.
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Regret nothing. At one time it was exactly what you wanted. |
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10-11-2006, 11:48 AM
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#8 |
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I like big (_|_)s.
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Charlottesville, Virginia
Age: 43
Posts: 19,254
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
Is Sam-I-Am related to Will.I.Am?
__________________
Regret nothing. At one time it was exactly what you wanted. |
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10-11-2006, 11:59 AM
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#9 |
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Playmaker
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Denver
Age: 43
Posts: 2,762
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
'cause he looks like Mr. T:
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10-11-2006, 12:04 PM
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#10 | |
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ellicott City, MD
Age: 42
Posts: 8,029
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
Quote:
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"Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man." The Dude |
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10-11-2006, 12:08 PM
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#11 |
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ellicott City, MD
Age: 42
Posts: 8,029
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
He'll only play when his beard reaches maximum potential, like these...
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"Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man." The Dude |
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10-11-2006, 12:34 PM
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#12 | |
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MVP
Join Date: May 2004
Age: 46
Posts: 10,164
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
Quote:
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10-11-2006, 12:39 PM
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#13 | |
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Playmaker
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Denver
Age: 43
Posts: 2,762
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
Quote:
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10-11-2006, 01:14 PM
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#14 | |
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I like big (_|_)s.
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Charlottesville, Virginia
Age: 43
Posts: 19,254
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
Quote:
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Regret nothing. At one time it was exactly what you wanted. |
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10-11-2006, 01:17 PM
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#15 |
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ellicott City, MD
Age: 42
Posts: 8,029
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Re: the REAL reason Duckett hasn't been playing
He won't play until Vincent and Jules bring his briefcase back
__________________
"Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man." The Dude |
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