[GoSkins!]

30. Fred Smoot decides to leave the NFL and start his own boat cruise business (player only).
31. T.O. decides to have his vocal chords removed in an attempt to prove he will not cause any more disruptions. Unfourtunatly, he emerges from surgery with an amputated leg due to a hospital clerical error. Further investigation traces the problem to nurse "chucky soup mom".
32. Taylor Jacobs is injury free for the entire preseason. He is put on injured reserve after the first game when Saunders hits him for not getting open.
33. The Patriots actually sign the real Diet Pepsi Machine. The league objects only to be overruled when it is reveled that machine actually is T.O. and the machine is ruled a prosthetic leg.
34. The Colts decide to keep thier coaches and players in tack, but hire the best counselors available to help them after thier yearly post-season collapse.
35. To pay for additional coaches, Snyder decides to build new seats at FedEx field. People complain when they realize these "partially obstructed" seats are actually located in parking lot "G".