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-   -   Getting impatient (http://www.thewarpath.net/showthread.php?t=11413)

Hail2em 03-11-2006 04:11 PM

Getting impatient
 
Im getting very impatient. i figured we would have signed someone by now...hate the waiting game while some of the free agnets we were talking about getting is getting signed.

SmootSmack 03-11-2006 04:15 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=Hail2em]Im getting very impatient. i figured we would have signed someone by now...hate the waiting game while some of the free agnets we were talking about getting is getting signed.[/QUOTE]

Apparently, Todd Collins won't even be here by tommorrow. Not that I'm desperate to sign him anyway though.

Archuleta, Randle El, and Andre Carter will all be at the Wizards vs. Pistons game tonight supposedly. It'd be nice if they were already signed by then, at least Carter!

GoSkins! 03-11-2006 04:17 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=TAFKAS]Apparently, Todd Collins won't even be here by tommorrow. Not that I'm desperate to sign him anyway though.

Archuleta, Randle El, and Andre Carter will all be at the Wizards vs. Pistons game tonight supposedly. It'd be nice if they were already signed by then, at least Carter![/QUOTE]

You know Snyder... If they are not signed, they won't be at the game. Snyder doesn't let guys out of the building until they sign the offer sheet.:)

diehardskin2982 03-11-2006 04:20 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
i hope we will sign at least one person soon.

wilsowilso 03-11-2006 04:23 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
Sign a free agent beer vendor. Anyone! Please. Someone from NFL Tibet. I'm becoming desperate.

Sheriff Gonna Getcha 03-11-2006 04:35 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=wilsowilso]Sign a free agent beer vendor. Anyone! Please. Someone from NFL Tibet. I'm becoming desperate.[/QUOTE]

Sign Zack Mills. :Smoker:

SmootSmack 03-11-2006 04:43 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[B]Redskins Agree to Terms with TAFKAS:[/B] Sheriff Gonna Getcha of TheWarpath.net reports TAFKAS has agreed to a lifetime contract extension with the Washington Redskins. Terms of the deal were not disclosed but it is expected that the Redskins will continue to provide years of great memories and TAFKAS will enjoy them...in perpetuity. It is expected that other TheWarpath.net members will be joining TAFKAS in the following days.

There, your first "signing" of the day

JoeRedskin 03-11-2006 05:04 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[B]In a shocking move, the Skins sign JoeRedskin[/B].

Only moments after signing his Arch-nemesis, TAFKAS, the Skins signed JoeRedskin. "Yeah, I know that fool is here" Joe is quoted as saying "but, really, that was part of my deal - I told'em 'sign him up to be my bitch'". According to Vinny Cerrato, "We are really, really thrilled with JoeR's signing - I mean we woulda signed Charles Manson if that meant we could get Joe. As it is, we will have TAFKAS clean the toilets with his tongue if that's what Joe wants. I mean really, it's win-win for us."

After initially, being surprised that the Skins would bother signing someone of TAFKAS' obvious limitations and downright idiocy, national pundits came to the slow realization that the TAFKAS signing was just a means to and end as the Skins pulled yet another big signing coupe by getting JoeRedskin - a brilliant, talented, and all around good guy. "Well, now it all makes sense" ESPN's John Clayton was heard to comment after hearing the details of JoeRedskin's contract. The details of TAFKAS' signing reveal that it is a pretty standard "personal services" contract w/ fairly low compensation -although it is expected that TAFKAS will be given a new set of knee pads. The JoeRedskin contract reveals that, in addition to a huge signing bonus, TAFKAS' "personal services" contract was signed over to Joe.

Neither TAFKAS nor his dumb-ass agent, That Guy (who apparently forgot to read the final six pages of TAFKAS contract, but still okayed it), could not be reached for comment.

EXoffender 03-11-2006 05:07 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
I'm ready to update my roster in Madden 06 and start playing with the new aquisitions.

SmootSmack 03-11-2006 05:11 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=JoeRedskin][B]In a shocking move, the Skins sign JoeRedskin[/B].

Only moments after signing his Arch-nemesis, TAFKAS, the Skins signed JoeRedskin. "Yeah, I know that fool is here" Joe is quoted as saying "but, really, that was part of my deal - I told'em 'sign him up to be my bitch'". According to Vinny Cerrato, "We are really, really thrilled with JoeR's signing - I mean we woulda signed Charles Manson if that meant we could get Joe. As it is, we will have TAFKAS clean the toilets with his tongue if that's what Joe wants. I mean really, it's win-win for us."

After initially, being surprised that the Skins would bother signing someone of TAFKAS' obvious limitations and downright idiocy, national pundits came to the slow realization that the TAFKAS signing was just a means to and end as the Skins pulled yet another big signing coupe by getting JoeRedskin - a brilliant, talented, and all around good guy. "Well, now it all makes sense" ESPN's John Clayton was heard to comment after hearing the details of JoeRedskin's contract. The details of TAFKAS' signing reveal that it is a pretty standard "personal services" contract w/ fairly low compensation -although it is expected that TAFKAS will be given a new set of knee pads. The JoeRedskin contract reveals that, in addition to a huge signing bonus, TAFKAS' "personal services" contract was signed over to Joe.

Neither TAFKAS nor his dumb-ass agent, That Guy (who apparently forgot to read the final six pages of TAFKAS contract, but still okayed it), could not be reached for comment.[/QUOTE]

JoeRedskin's contract was voided after the Jerry Jones wannabe used a double-negative in the last sentence of the above post. Interestingly enough, "Double-Negative" is JoeRedskin's nickname on the football field. He's that bad an influence.

Word is now the Texans may be interested in signing JR to block for David Carr...apparently the Texans really hate David Carr

That Guy 03-11-2006 05:18 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=JoeRedskin]
Neither TAFKAS nor his dumb-ass agent, That Guy (who apparently forgot to read the final six pages of TAFKAS contract, but still okayed it), could not be reached for comment.[/QUOTE]


cry some more beotch, I still got paid.

JoeRedskin 03-11-2006 05:25 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=TAFKAS]JoeRedskin's contract was voided after the Jerry Jones wannabe used a double-negative in the last sentence of the above post. Interestingly enough, "Double-Negative" is JoeRedskin's nickname on the football field. He's that bad an influence.[/QUOTE]

TAFKAS, however, has requested extra-strength knee pads. "Hey, I really, really like it down here. I am learning to squeal with the best of 'em." When asked what TAFKAS was squealing about, team officials refused to comment further although two employees were seen zipping up their fly's after leaving TAFKAS' "office".

JoeRedskin 03-11-2006 05:27 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=That Guy]cry some more beotch, I still got paid.[/QUOTE]

Taking it up the ass from Vinny and his front office cronies is not my kind of compensation - but, hey, if it works for you.

jdlea 03-11-2006 05:29 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
OMG...this whole arch nemesis thing may be the best thing that has ever happened to this board...lmao.

SmootSmack 03-11-2006 05:32 PM

Re: Getting impatient
 
[QUOTE=JoeRedskin]TAFKAS, however, has requested extra-strength knee pads. "Hey, I really, really like it down here. I am learning to squeal with the best of 'em." When asked what TAFKAS was squealing about, team officials refused to comment further although two employees were seen zipping up their fly's after leaving TAFKAS' "office".[/QUOTE]

Aren't you from the gonorrhea and syphillis capital of the world? I think I'll call you JoeCrabs from now on, or maybe JoeClap.

Hey you bitched about not getting to be a poll sponsor, maybe you'll get one now

"The JoeRedskin 'What Should My STD Appropriate Name Be' Poll"


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