mooby
09-16-2019, 09:59 PM
I feel like it's cathartic to have a thread to just vent in because it's a day later and I'm teetering slightly above apathy with this team right now.
I'm just gonna make a list of things that grind my gears:
The Redskins looking like straight ass for the 2nd week in a row (really though other than the odd year here and there it's like almost 30 years at this point)
Jay Gruden looking like garbage (6 years in? HE IS WHO WE THOUGHT HE WAS) yet again. Why the fuck do I gotta watch your press conferences to see you saying there's no excuses when all you do is offer up excuses. Just come out and say "we fucking suck. Nowhere to go but up. All I can promise is we are gonna work our asses off, nothing's guaranteed."
Josh Norman - Why does your name gotta be the first thing I see when I check ESPN? Why can't we have just one week where you STFU and tell the media "brah fuck you guys, I'm gonna let my play do the talking"
Our overpaid, underperforming secondary: Communication issues, IDGAF what the reasoning is why Norman is getting burnt and the announcers are saying it's because he was expecting safety help from Nicholson and there was none. Norman is still making absolute beaucoup fucking dollars and so is Landon Collins. Figure the shit out. Dunbar, love the kid but he can't stay healthy. Jury is still out on Fabian Moreau. DRC looks and plays like ass. Big fucking fail yet again.
Greg Manusky - bruh why is Jay Gruden such absolute ass when it comes to picking defensive coordinators? Haslett, Barry, Manusky. Is Manusky trying to reinvent the wheel becoming the first successful defense that can't pressure a qb? How much fucking money and draft picks do we have to invest in this D to get such shit results? Norman, Collins, Kerrigan, Sweat, 2nd round pick who doesn't play like it Ryan Anderson, supposedly monster d-line with (admitted solo baller) Deron Payne and Matty I who hasn't shown up yet this year. Nothing bad to say about Jonathan Allen except get well soon.
The offensive line - truly this mother fucker is straight offensive, I am offended at how garbage they look running the ball. Motherfuckers are supposed to enjoy running the ball. Motherfucking Morgan Moses talking about it's a slap in the face when a HOFer like Peterson doesn't play - motherfucker it's a slap in the face when he does play and you play like straight ass, getting dominated all night and straight murdering us with your horseshit holding calls. DeMarcus Lawrence didn't even need to go up against 96yo Donald Penn when he can feast on your lard ass all night. Motherfucking lack of depth on the line yet again, Flowers might be pleasantly surprising when it comes to pass blocking but there is nobody on the line doing a half decent job when it comes to run blocking this year.
Trent Williams - goddamn bruh I get it, Bruce Allen is a succubus who sucks the joy out of rooting and/or playing for the Redskins. But we need you. Not just as a player, but as a leader. For the love of god just come out publicly and tell us what you want.
Bruce Allen - I could write a short fucking story on why Vinny Cerrato can't hold your jock strap, but know this: You are literally holding this team back because you can't talk to Trent Williams and get him to come back.
Tight ends - jesus fucking christ I get it Vernon Davis, it's a sweetheart story about a possible HOFer that comes home to finish his career with his hometown team but bro you can't run block for shit. And Jeremy Sprinkle do something with your life man, because you aren't any better. And Jordan Reed where do I start? Fucking retire already man, I don't want to have to rely on you and with 10 concussions you're already in like the 95th percentile for having soup for brains in 10 years. This game is not worth this shit, not for you. You're fast tracking yourself on the Junior Seau route only there is no HOF at the end of this tunnel. Holy fuck man.
Just so it isn't all negative karma in here:
Tress Way and Dustin Hopkins - way to be, guys. I hope you two are the answer for the next 5+ years minimum.
Kevin O'Connell: for the love of god anybody that can remove Jay Gruden from the offensive responsibilities is an ace in my book. May your development be swift and your ascension quick.
De'Ron Payne: way to fucking bring it guy. You bright shining star in the middle of this bowl of shit soup.
Scary Terry: I don't know that words can do justice to how happy I am for the start that you've had. I hope all the good things in life happen to you, and to nobody else but you. I wish that humble pie you eat every day would launch itself into Josh Norman's face.
I'm just gonna make a list of things that grind my gears:
The Redskins looking like straight ass for the 2nd week in a row (really though other than the odd year here and there it's like almost 30 years at this point)
Jay Gruden looking like garbage (6 years in? HE IS WHO WE THOUGHT HE WAS) yet again. Why the fuck do I gotta watch your press conferences to see you saying there's no excuses when all you do is offer up excuses. Just come out and say "we fucking suck. Nowhere to go but up. All I can promise is we are gonna work our asses off, nothing's guaranteed."
Josh Norman - Why does your name gotta be the first thing I see when I check ESPN? Why can't we have just one week where you STFU and tell the media "brah fuck you guys, I'm gonna let my play do the talking"
Our overpaid, underperforming secondary: Communication issues, IDGAF what the reasoning is why Norman is getting burnt and the announcers are saying it's because he was expecting safety help from Nicholson and there was none. Norman is still making absolute beaucoup fucking dollars and so is Landon Collins. Figure the shit out. Dunbar, love the kid but he can't stay healthy. Jury is still out on Fabian Moreau. DRC looks and plays like ass. Big fucking fail yet again.
Greg Manusky - bruh why is Jay Gruden such absolute ass when it comes to picking defensive coordinators? Haslett, Barry, Manusky. Is Manusky trying to reinvent the wheel becoming the first successful defense that can't pressure a qb? How much fucking money and draft picks do we have to invest in this D to get such shit results? Norman, Collins, Kerrigan, Sweat, 2nd round pick who doesn't play like it Ryan Anderson, supposedly monster d-line with (admitted solo baller) Deron Payne and Matty I who hasn't shown up yet this year. Nothing bad to say about Jonathan Allen except get well soon.
The offensive line - truly this mother fucker is straight offensive, I am offended at how garbage they look running the ball. Motherfuckers are supposed to enjoy running the ball. Motherfucking Morgan Moses talking about it's a slap in the face when a HOFer like Peterson doesn't play - motherfucker it's a slap in the face when he does play and you play like straight ass, getting dominated all night and straight murdering us with your horseshit holding calls. DeMarcus Lawrence didn't even need to go up against 96yo Donald Penn when he can feast on your lard ass all night. Motherfucking lack of depth on the line yet again, Flowers might be pleasantly surprising when it comes to pass blocking but there is nobody on the line doing a half decent job when it comes to run blocking this year.
Trent Williams - goddamn bruh I get it, Bruce Allen is a succubus who sucks the joy out of rooting and/or playing for the Redskins. But we need you. Not just as a player, but as a leader. For the love of god just come out publicly and tell us what you want.
Bruce Allen - I could write a short fucking story on why Vinny Cerrato can't hold your jock strap, but know this: You are literally holding this team back because you can't talk to Trent Williams and get him to come back.
Tight ends - jesus fucking christ I get it Vernon Davis, it's a sweetheart story about a possible HOFer that comes home to finish his career with his hometown team but bro you can't run block for shit. And Jeremy Sprinkle do something with your life man, because you aren't any better. And Jordan Reed where do I start? Fucking retire already man, I don't want to have to rely on you and with 10 concussions you're already in like the 95th percentile for having soup for brains in 10 years. This game is not worth this shit, not for you. You're fast tracking yourself on the Junior Seau route only there is no HOF at the end of this tunnel. Holy fuck man.
Just so it isn't all negative karma in here:
Tress Way and Dustin Hopkins - way to be, guys. I hope you two are the answer for the next 5+ years minimum.
Kevin O'Connell: for the love of god anybody that can remove Jay Gruden from the offensive responsibilities is an ace in my book. May your development be swift and your ascension quick.
De'Ron Payne: way to fucking bring it guy. You bright shining star in the middle of this bowl of shit soup.
Scary Terry: I don't know that words can do justice to how happy I am for the start that you've had. I hope all the good things in life happen to you, and to nobody else but you. I wish that humble pie you eat every day would launch itself into Josh Norman's face.