understanding a sexless marriage: Should I stay or go??

I dont know where else to go with this, so i'll ask my friends here at WP.

I've been with my wife for a few years now. Every aspect of our life is happy and wonderful. We have no children, and it's just us. We love to travel, eat out, go to the movies together, and all of that stuff.

We get along great and I consider her the only other person in my life besides my father, that i completley trust.

The problem is, since returning from our trip to Florida 32 days ago, we have had a sexless marriage, and a complete lack of other intimacy. I blame myself and have tried everything to try and bring it back. I even started lifting weights to try and change my physical build hoping it would help...Nothing has worked. I'm not ready to give up just yet, but i need help in seeing which way this thing is headed.

My father tells me that this is how it usually goes with people after a few years, and guys that i work with say the same thing. My problem is, at only 25 years of age, i'm not ready to accept that the sexual part of my marriage is over, like so many guys have done who are in their 30's and 40's.

However, the realistic part of me says that this is probably it. I love her to death and would give the waking world for her, and don't want to leave. But, is it just better to leave now before the kids come, so i can get over the heartache and hopefully be psychologically healed by my early 30's???

Everyone goes through dry spells. What does she say when you bring it up to her?

And also, while I'm not 30 or 40, if there is no sex in THOSE marriages, that's a GIANT problem. Women reach their sexual peak in their thirties, so that doesn't sound right to me. Don't get me wrong, you won't be banging every night, but you should at least be getting it on the regular 2-4 times a week.

Hmmmmmm, I'd say the best way to deal with this situation is head on. You have to ask her what she is thinking. Is she depressed, embarassed about her body? Does she not find you attractive anymore? Is she getting fulfillment elsewhere? All valid questions someone in your shoes should be reasonably expected to ask, given the circumstances. 6 weeks and no boom boom.........that, in a marriage, is getting a little ridiculous, and would make any other man in america a little concerned, if not wary.

You have every right to sit her down, and see what is going on. At least you'll know, and knowing is half the battle, right?

Everyone goes through dry spells. What does she say when you bring it up to her?

She says she is either too tired or just doesnt feel like it. If i prod and push her too much about it, she gets angry. Like badly angry.

Last night i actually slept on our couch it was so bad.

And also, while I'm not 30 or 40, if there is no sex in THOSE marriages, that's a GIANT problem. Women reach their sexual peak in their thirties, so that doesn't sound right to me. Don't get me wrong, you won't be banging every night, but you should at least be getting it on the regular 2-4 times a week.

Seriously...

Guys tell me now... if there is none when you get married, mark me down for not getting married.

EIther way... have you guys discussed it at all and shes just like "no"? Thats a huge issue...

If you havent really discussed it and it just hasn't "happened", maybe try planning like a nice date night or something, and going above and beyond to break it??

She says she is either too tired or just doesnt feel like it. If i prod and push her too much about it, she gets angry. Like badly angry.

Last night i actually slept on our couch it was so bad.

See now that is a huge problem to me. Like hey, theres nights my girlfriend wants to and I dont and vice versa.....sometimes you're not feeling well, or just tired or whatever... but the fact that shes flipping out like that I think is a red flag.

Sex is a VERY important part of a relationship. If you're not having sex, why are people together? I mean that completley seriously.

I mean, how long has it been up to this point?

Seriously...

Guys tell me now... if there is none when you get married, mark me down for not getting married.

EIther way... have you guys discussed it at all and shes just like "no"? Thats a huge issue...

If you havent really discussed it and it just hasn't "happened", maybe try planning like a nice date night or something, and going above and beyond to break it??

I dont have official polls or what not, but i saw something on a website where it says 65% of US married couples have sex only once a week, 20% are once every 2 weeks, and 15% of people go longer than a month. That data was from 2009

I have tried asking about it, like i said, she gets furious if i ask too many questions.

All of my married friends, and my father, told me this would happen BEFORE, i got married, and i was just foolish enough to believe it wouldnt happen to me.

I'm already in shape, i only took up weight training hoping that the extra muscle would spark something....

Seriously...

Guys tell me now... if there is none when you get married, mark me down for not getting married.

EIther way... have you guys discussed it at all and shes just like "no"? Thats a huge issue...

If you havent really discussed it and it just hasn't "happened", maybe try planning like a nice date night or something, and going above and beyond to break it??

If the flowers, candy, dinner out and romantic wooing doesn't get you the payoff when u get home that evening, you will definitely know something is wrong. I agree with GManc, take one evening, get everything ready to roll, get her the flowers, dress up nice, take her out for a nice dinner, and then bring her home for dessert. If she doesn't give in then, well, I don't know what to tell ya man........

See now that is a huge problem to me. Like hey, theres nights my girlfriend wants to and I dont and vice versa.....sometimes you're not feeling well, or just tired or whatever... but the fact that shes flipping out like that I think is a red flag.

Sex is a VERY important part of a relationship. If you're not having sex, why are people together? I mean that completley seriously.

I mean, how long has it been up to this point?

32 days ago, or almost 6 weeks.