RiggoRules
09-09-2006, 03:40 PM
He essentially ruled himself out for the opener Sept. 11 against the Minnesota Vikings. He wore a helmet and his No. 26 jersey during the entire practice Sept. 8 for the first time since partially dislocating his left shoulder four weeks ago, but said he was focusing on the upcoming games against Dallas and Houston.
"The way things look, bro, you'll probably be seeing 2-6 against Dallas," Portis said. "But who knows? If not, I should be ready for Houston. They want me to be 100 percent."
Based on this is why I said he Might not be ready
Which confirms my point, that you are engaging in wishful thinking.
The following is a prayer being uttered by many in the Dallas area this week:
Dear Jesus, as the Cowboys season is on us, I am asking for you to show some mercy. Okay, I know that our team is owned by the Prince of Darkness himself, but don't you think that handing us that locker room cancer, T.O. is punishment enough? And for crying out loud, that thing you did to us with Vanderjagt -- a bit over the top don't you think? It's not like we're a bunch of Sodimites (that thing with Aikmen -- that was a long time ago and he was just confused and experimenting). We are in great fear and trembling of what the Redskins are going to do to us this year.
We got the message last year in the first game we played them that you are mightily displeased with us. Sure, their coach is on much better terms with you than our fat tub of lard, but I am begging for your mercy.
I promise, that if you will smite down Clinton Portis for our first game this year, that I will not touch any barnyard animals in an unnatural way during the regular season. I can't promise to stop thinking about it, but I can probably not do it for the regular season.
I'm not worried about anything beyond that because in spite of my unrealistic hopes and faith, I know there is no chance in hell that the Cowboys will be in the playoffs.
Amen
"The way things look, bro, you'll probably be seeing 2-6 against Dallas," Portis said. "But who knows? If not, I should be ready for Houston. They want me to be 100 percent."
Based on this is why I said he Might not be ready
Which confirms my point, that you are engaging in wishful thinking.
The following is a prayer being uttered by many in the Dallas area this week:
Dear Jesus, as the Cowboys season is on us, I am asking for you to show some mercy. Okay, I know that our team is owned by the Prince of Darkness himself, but don't you think that handing us that locker room cancer, T.O. is punishment enough? And for crying out loud, that thing you did to us with Vanderjagt -- a bit over the top don't you think? It's not like we're a bunch of Sodimites (that thing with Aikmen -- that was a long time ago and he was just confused and experimenting). We are in great fear and trembling of what the Redskins are going to do to us this year.
We got the message last year in the first game we played them that you are mightily displeased with us. Sure, their coach is on much better terms with you than our fat tub of lard, but I am begging for your mercy.
I promise, that if you will smite down Clinton Portis for our first game this year, that I will not touch any barnyard animals in an unnatural way during the regular season. I can't promise to stop thinking about it, but I can probably not do it for the regular season.
I'm not worried about anything beyond that because in spite of my unrealistic hopes and faith, I know there is no chance in hell that the Cowboys will be in the playoffs.
Amen